Where I Woke

I woke up in a hospital room. I don't know what time it was. I think Liz was there, and I met a nurse and a PCA. I think my nurse was named Erica. I don't remember the PCA's name. He was large.

I was in pain. It hurt to move. It hurt to breathe. It hurt not to move. I had some nausea. I wasn't sure I was awake. I got the idea that the surgery had taken longer than expected, and the robot didn't work. I had a huge incision, stapled shut. I guess it was already evening shift, but I don't know what time it was. It seemed noisy and busy. I just wanted to shut down again, and wake up when everything was right.

There was a little button clipped to my hospital gown, which I was told I could push for pain relief. I figured out eventually that pushing it gave me a dose of a pain med. It was pretty powerful stuff. A couple of pushes, and I could sleep through anything. Of course, the pain meds were timed, so I could only push the button every ten or fifteen minutes.

I had a tube across my face, with prongs up my nose for oxygen. I guess, when I would fall asleep, my oxygen would drop, without the supplement. There was a sensor with a glowing red light on my right index finger to keep track of my oxygen.

I also had a catheter, which didn't bother me much, as I couldn't move anyway. And I had things wrapped around my calves, which would take turns inflating and deflating. For the first day, I didn't mind that. They got annoying later.

There was a board on the wall across from the foot of the bed. It had my name on it, Patient's preferred name, and places for the nurse's name, PCA's name, diet (clear liquids), goals, and other stuff. Under activity, it said, "Up to chair today. Walk tomorrow." Getting up to a chair seemed like a much to ambitious goal. Just staying conscious seemed like a lot of effort. And not worth it.

There was a tray at the side of the bed. It had a couple of things on it. A small pitcher of water and a cup with a straw. And a plastic tube thing with a mouthpiece. An incentive spirometer. I knew that after an operation, a patient is supposed to walk and breathe. The incentive spirometer has a tube above the mouthpiece with a bit of plastic that would rise when you inhaled through mouthpiece. You're supposed to breathe in fast enough to bring the bit of plastic above the first arrow, and keep it below the second. Then another tube to the side has a piston that rises with continued airflow, measuring the volume in the breath. I was told to try for 1000 mL.

I snatched up the spirometer, and took a breath. I got it up over 1500 mL. Breathing didn't hurt that much, and I knew it was supposed to be good for me. I took a second breath, and got it to 2000 mL. Then I coughed. Coughing is also encouraged. It helps open the airways. Coughing hurt like hell. I put the spirometer back down.

I took a few sips of water. I was feeling a little thirsty, and my mouth was dry. And my throat hurt some. I figured that was probably from the tube down my throat during surgery. I talked with squeak. I couldn't make my voice sound normal.

Damn, I thought. This sucks.

I pushed the pain button, lay my head down, waited a few minutes, and pushed the button again. Then I drifted back to sleep.